If you were a kid in the 70s or 80s, or maybe even today, you might remember Opposite Day. Some other kid would say, “I like your coat,” or “I like your haircut,” or “You’re smart [or funny or cute].” You’d be feeling good, but then they’d say, “Too bad it’s Opposite Day!” Pretty funny, but who knew Opposite Day was really a thing?
Well, it turns out Jan. 25 is Opposite Day. Really. So, while you sleep all day and stay up all night, or eat breakfast for dinner, we thought it could be a day where you also get some really terrible legal advice. Unfortunately, a lot of lawyers give this advice out every day, so watch out! If you get this kind of advice from someone else, do the opposite!
DON’T TAKE YOUR OWN PHOTOS FOR EVIDENCE. If you’re ever in an auto accident, don’t worry about taking photos to show an attorney in the immediate aftermath. After you call the police, they’ll take all the photos you need, not to mention the photos your insurance provider will get. Those photos will absolutely not be used in your case in any way, shape, or form.
ALWAYS TRUST TV LAWYERS. We’re lucky to live in a world where the law really isn’t incredibly nuanced and intricate, and we have a great resource we can trust to give us sound legal advice — lawyer TV commercials! So, don’t do your own research and read the books and guides a lawyer has written that will actually help you. Just look at how many lawyers have their own TV commercials! You must be really good to get your own TV commercial (and judges and juries will think you have a great case if you have a TV lawyer — because they never watch TV).
NEVER BE FULLY HONEST WITH YOUR LAWYER. When your law firm starts asking you a bunch of personal questions, there’s no need to share all the embarrassing details, right? After all, maintaining your pride is much more important than giving your attorney the full picture of what happened. This meticulous and detail-oriented profession certainly doesn’t need the fullest possible picture of your situation. Your lawyer won’t care if you haven’t told them everything — and the insurance company will never find that stuff out, right?
TRUST YOUR CASE TO A FIRM WITH NO SPECIALIZATION. Much like how the best person to perform brain surgery is your family’s general physician, the best legal advice will come from firms that don’t specialize in any one area of law. Forget all that garbage you might have heard about how specialization and National Board Certification is important. After all, we’ve already established the law really isn’t that complicated, remember? So, the same guy who did your brother-in-law’s DUI can take your child’s cerebral palsy case and make sure they get the care they need for the rest of their life.
POST YOUR WHOLE LIFE ON SOCIAL MEDIA. During your case, it’s perfectly okay to disclose all the intimate details of your accident to your hundreds of followers on your various social media accounts. The insurance companies, those beacons of truth and justice, definitely aren’t trolling your Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter accounts for any pictures or posts they can use as evidence to lower your compensation. So, go ahead and post away — after all, you wouldn’t want your followers to think you were in an accident or something. Judges totally understand social media; they’re all about 25 or 30 years old, so they get it.
While all of this advice may seem rather silly, people fall prey to insurance companies and bad legal advice every day. Get information you trust that will help you and your family. We’ll give that to you even if you don’t hire us — even on Opposite Day!